Search This Blog

11 December 2007

The New Vleeptron Supercomputer is Here! My Office Is Clean! Vista Works! PIZZAQ!

Well, sure, click your brains out!

Publicke Notice

This is the first post composed and posted on Vleeptron's brand-new Supercomputer, The Powercow. After an excruciating week of The Professional Order Person invading my innermost intimacies -- documents, toys, books, soul -- and making the office pass muster of the Health Department, I paid her and said Buh-Bye, phoned the Tech Todd, and he zipped right over with a system which is the envy of every dental practice and Realtor in the Pioneer Valley. Took about an hour, but Todd cabled and d/ld and installed Everything, and sold me my very first Flash Memory Thingie to boot. Vista works like a champ and so far hasn't displayed any DIE DIRTY KIKE messages on my screen, like the Mac ads on TV suggest is an odd quirk of Vista I can expect momentarily. (If you're Presbyterian it may say DIE FILTHY PRESBYTERIAN, or so the Mac ads imply.

I don't care how troublesome Vista is ... I've just spent six or more years sutured to WindowsME, it's gotta be better than that. But give me a few weeks to get up to speed and catch my breath, and I think I'll hunt up this Muy Starwarz ubuntu thing like everybody's telling me too. Todd says I can run them both on The Powercow.

I'm writing this in notepad, and notepad opened in a teeny-weenie font, maybe 10pt. If anybody knows how to bang it up to a nice eye-friewndly 14, please Leave A Comment.

Todd says that in a few weeks, automatically, without having to take a bus to Bellingham WA, I will get an upgrade called Service Pack 1, and Vista will stop detecting my faith and cursing it, and will also solve all its other early problems.

Oh wait! Do I have MSPaint??? Todd said Paint would be here.

I found it! Okay, so here's my first piece of Refrigeratorkunst on the PowerCow, AND here's my first PowerCow PIZZAQ!

Behold my dredel, the famous spinning game top of Hannukah. (Kiddies play a dredel gambling game for chocolate coins.)

This one's a peach, I bought it in a jewelry store in Amsterdam. It's new, but dans la mode du 18th Century European Judaica. It's solid silver. Lovely to look at.

But what's wrong with my dredel?

5 slices with mushrooms and onions -- Parve, i.e., a veggie pizza that couldn't not be kosher if it tried.

The Hebrew letters stand for the Hebrew words which mean: a Great Miracle Happened Here. The Great Miracle was that a small bunch of violent nationalist Jews, the Maccabees, stomped the crap out of the army that Alexander the Great left behind, and made them get the fuck out of the Holy Land/Judea/whatever it was called then -- elephants and all.


11 comments:

James J. Olson said...

Except that your dreidl says a Great Miracle Happened There.

Nes - Nun - Great

Gadol - Gimmel - Miracle

Haya - Hey - Happened

Sham - Shin - There (is what your dreidl says)

Pey - Po - Here (is what dreidls in Israel say)

Anonymous said...

shin is correct, apparently there are several variations in europe and israe. btw if you enter dreidel into google the third result you get is an old vleeptron post. this dreidel is either not new or it is not made of silver. in any case smething is strange with those alfebet characters

at least now i know what a dreidel is and how it works

Vleeptron Dude said...

Okay, one of The Usual Suspects has replied to the PizzaQ anonymously.

++++++++++

I don't know exactly what is wrong with your dreidl, but I can
almost certainly tell you that they are not solid silver. They are
not tarnished like silver.

Do they have hallmarks stamped on them someplace? Like two or three
little shields or letters or other little symbols next to each
other. If they are solid silver, they would have these marks, and
then a decimal stamped onto them someplace (probably .625).

They look like they were once plated (you can see on the top of the
handle where the plate has worn off from use).

They are probably what is called 'white metal', basically a white
brass. Quite lovely and valuable, both monetarily and for your
memories.

Sorry to disappoint.

What do you think is wrong with them? I think they're lovely,
nonetheless. Are the letters wrong

++++++++++++++

Okay, I lied, if you say they ain't solid silver, they ain't solid silver, but they're solid Some Silverish Metal, and I liked the look of them, and as the price was in Dutch Guilder, and i never know what foreign money is worth in dollars until I get home and get the credit card bill with conversion, I bought it.

But there's still something wrong with the dredel.

It's not the Hebrew letters, all 4 correct letters are on the 4 faces of the dredel.

Okay, this is the only hint I'm willing to provide at this time.

All I've provided is this image -- 2 images to show all 4 faces of the dredel.

I could say that this image isn't sufficient evidence to solve the What's wrong PizzaQ. I could say: Stare at it all you want, but that won't help.

But I suspect that's not quite true.

Assuming that whatever metal it is, it's solid, probably cast from molten metal -- I think a detective of the caliber of Columbo or Judge Dee or Sherlock Holmes or Jane Marple or Auguste Dupin -- maybe Adrian Monk -- could solve the PizzaQ with just this image as evidence. Oh, also Herr Kommissar Berlach could just look at the image and solve the PizzaQ.

I know the answer, but NOT because I'm one of the greatest detectives who ever lived.

MIKE! WAKE UP! This is Mike's kind of PizzaQ. Also maybe Steve from the USA State shaped like the palm of the human right hand. Also RamanuJohn should take a shot at this. AMY! ABBAS! (Who's Pakistan's most famous detective?) Helvetian Dewd!

James J. Olson said...

Ok, then the picture you are showing does not show all four sides of the dreidl.

The first picture shows the first and last letters, nes and sham.

The second picture shows the last two letters, haya and sham.

I'm assuming that dreidls, like hebrew itself, read right to left, so the letter not showing, that would be to the left of the first, is gadol.

James J. Olson said...

As I look at it closer as well, I think it is indeed plated in silver...it just needs some polishing love.

James J. Olson said...

Unless, of course, what is wrong with your dreidl is that if you are indeed showing all four faces, then the letters are incorrect for the tradition.

Vleeptron Dude said...

okay, i promise u, my dredel has all the proper 4 laters, maybe i skrood up in taking the 2 photos and missed a letter.

that's not what's wrong with the dredel.

and happy to re-believe it's silver. or silver plate. but you should see it next time you're over. it really is pretty. even if it's made of molybdenum.

Vleeptron Dude said...

... has all the proper 4 LETTERS i mean

Mike Stone said...

I didn't have a long time to look at it, but other than your tendency to misspell dreidel, it looks like the letters are backwards. Or maybe I should say, "backwards are letters the." If that's not right, you'll have to wait until I get home.

Vleeptron Dude said...

Too late! The great Swiss detective Herr Kommissar Hans Berlach has solved the Mystery of the Wrong Dredel! The solution is in a comment here:

http://vleeptronz.blogspot.com/2007/12/case-of-wrong-dredel.html

Vleeptron Dude said...

also dredel is a transliteration into the Roman alphabet of a Hebrew word, so (like Chanukah and Hannukah etc) there are many equally kosher spellings.